10 hours ago, Gannan said:

True. When I was a high school teacher, that was my #1 job. I had a 90% trans conversion rate. I racked in the bonuses for it too! Whatever gender they came in with, I switched 'em! Even if they already had trans surgery at school last year. It wasn't abnormal for kids to change genders at least a dozen times before graduating. Who would have thought that the person to foil this sweet deal would be the wife of a professional wrestling promotor. Damn her!

Only 90%? Slacker

2 hours ago, DrPhilly said:

Only 90%? Slacker

Gotta pump those numbers up, those are rookie numbers

@Diehardfan voted for this

14 hours ago, Gannan said:

True. When I was a high school teacher, that was my #1 job. I had a 90% trans conversion rate. I racked in the bonuses for it too! Whatever gender they came in with, I switched 'em! Even if they already had trans surgery at school last year. It wasn't abnormal for kids to change genders at least a dozen times before graduating. Who would have thought that the person to foil this sweet deal would be the wife of a professional wrestling promotor. Damn her!

I don't see any mention of swapping all the math and science classes for gender affirmation therapy. Honestly your school should have been cancelled.

15 hours ago, Phillyterp85 said:

Well, that’s not always the solution. A child may be requesting that their teacher refer to them by a different name or gender, but not tell their parents that they are doing that. I have a friend who is a middle school teacher. He had a student that requested to be called by a different name and gender every several months. Clearly not healthy behavior. My friend was not allowed to inform the student’s parents that this was happening. That was the policy of the school (which may have been an entire school district directive). Do you think that’s right? I don’t. If my son or daughter was secretly requesting to be identified by a different gender and/or name in school, I’d want to know about it.

But again that’s a local issue. I’d be taking it up with the members of my school board to change the policy.

Talk to your kids!

You won't have to go to the school to talk to teachers and administration to find out something going on with your child. Schools can't fix bad parenting.

My objective in life is to be a kind enough father that my kids won't feel like they have to confide in strangers due to a lack of trust with me. If someone's kid is sharing deep personal secrets with teachers instead of a parent, there's probably a good reason for it.

1 hour ago, Phillyterp85 said:

@Diehardfan voted for this

VANDALS!

20 minutes ago, toolg said:

Talk to your kids!

You won't have to go to the school to talk to teachers and administration to find out something going on with your child. Schools can't fix bad parenting.

I do talk to my kids. However, it's not inconceivable to me that despite how much I talk to my kids and how much I'm involved in my kids life, that they could be doing something at school in secret, and I'd want to know about it if their teacher is aware it's going on. Why should a teacher be forbidden from talking to the parents of a child about something that is going on at school?

https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2026/aug/26/paper-product-toilet-paper-tariffs-us-canada?CMP=share_btn_url

Trump's America, gilded in fake gold and covered with sh!t

6 minutes ago, Phillyterp85 said:

I do talk to my kids. However, it's not inconceivable to me that despite how much I talk to my kids and how much I'm involved in my kids life, that they could be doing something at school in secret, and I'd want to know about it if their teacher is aware it's going on.

Don't send them to school! Then they can't do it at school in secret!

I don't know what to tell you to do if your kids are keeping something like this a secret. If they are going through something major and you have a healthy relationship with them, then you will know about it long before anybody in the school tells you.

Kids need safe, secure places to learn and grow. If the school is the only safe place they have to be themselves, that is a failure at home.

14 minutes ago, toolg said:

Don't send them to school! Then they can't do it at school in secret!

I don't know what to tell you to do if your kids are keeping something like this a secret. If they are going through something major and you have a healthy relationship with them, then you will know about it long before anybody in the school tells you.

Kids need safe, secure places to learn and grow. If the school is the only safe place they have to be themselves, that is a failure at home.

I think it's a pretty disingenuous statement to make to say that if a child is doing something in school that the parent is unaware of, then this means that there is a failure at home. Or that as long as you have a health relationship with your children, that means that you'll always be the first to know about something major before anyone else in their circle. And how does it help the situation if a teacher if forbidden from discussing the issue with the parents? If a student expressed to my friend that he was feeling down and/or depressed, he'd be allowed to talk to the parents about it. But that same child using a different gender identity in school, he'd be forbidden from bringing that up to the parents. Do you think that makes sense?

41 minutes ago, Phillyterp85 said:

I do talk to my kids. However, it's not inconceivable to me that despite how much I talk to my kids and how much I'm involved in my kids life, that they could be doing something at school in secret, and I'd want to know about it if their teacher is aware it's going on. Why should a teacher be forbidden from talking to the parents of a child about something that is going on at school?

What you want and what your teacher wants might be two different things. If the information a student told to a teacher in private isn't related to anything that could potentially harm themselves or others, you can't force a teacher to disclose anything.

31 minutes ago, toolg said:

Don't send them to school! Then they can't do it at school in secret!

I don't know what to tell you to do if your kids are keeping something like this a secret. If they are going through something major and you have a healthy relationship with them, then you will know about it long before anybody in the school tells you.

Kids need safe, secure places to learn and grow. If the school is the only safe place they have to be themselves, that is a failure at home.

But for argument's sake, sure let's say this is a result of there not being the best relationship in the home and that's why the student is using a different gender identify in school. How does it help matters by preventing the teacher and/or guidance counselor from discussing this with the parents? And in this specific case, in which a middle school student was switching their gender identity every couple months, this doesn't seem to be a case of a child having gender dysphoria, and might be a case of something else going on. So again, how does it benefit the student and the family that the parents are forbidden from being notified about this behavior?

3 minutes ago, we_gotta_believe said:

What you want and what your teacher wants might be two different things. If the information a student told to a teacher in private isn't related to anything that could potentially harm themselves or others, you can't force a teacher to disclose anything.

Re-read my initial post. I'm not talking about a policy to FORCE a teacher to disclose the information to the parents. The policy at this school FORBIDS the teacher from disclosing the information to the parents. My friend wanted to bring up the behavior to the parents, but wasn't allowed to do so.

2 minutes ago, Phillyterp85 said:

Re-read my initial post. I'm not talking about a policy to FORCE a teacher to disclose the information to the parents. The policy at this school FORBIDS the teacher from disclosing the information to the parents. My friend wanted to bring up the behavior to the parents, but wasn't allowed to do so.

You'd have to look into what the laws in that state allow for when it comes to districts setting their own policy for something like this. I'd personally argue in favor of teachers being allowed to use their own discretion on when to and when not to disclose something to parents, but knowing how insane some segments of the country are with gender and sexual orientation, I can understand the rationale of a district policy that takes a harder stance against disclosure out of an abundance of caution to protect the privacy of students.

14 minutes ago, Phillyterp85 said:

How does it help matters by preventing the teacher and/or guidance counselor from discussing this with the parents?

You can't envision a scenario where it helps matters when a district policy prioritizes protecting the privacy of students regardless of the circumstances? You're doing the shtick again.

1 minute ago, we_gotta_believe said:

You can't envision a scenario where it helps matters when a district policy prioritizes protecting the privacy of students regardless of the circumstances? You're doing the shtick again.

No you're right, a scenario in which a 13 year old kid is telling a teacher he is a different gender every 2-3 months is clearly the sign of a young healthy individual who doesn't need any help at all. And this definitely isn't causing any type of distraction in the classroom. And there's definitely no chance that the kid is doing this to act out and get attention either. And so it's a great idea to forbid the teacher from letting the parents know that this is going on.

Someone might be doing schtick here, but it sure isn't me.

In my son's fantasy football league, the loser has to wear a tail to school for a week. He had the #1 pick though so I think he's probably in the clear.

Just now, Phillyterp85 said:

No you're right, a scenario in which a 13 year old kid is telling a teacher he is a different gender every 2 months is clearly the sign of a young healthy individual who doesn't need any help at all. And this definitely isn't causing any type of distraction in the classroom. And there's definitely no chance that the kid is doing this to act out and get attention either. And so it's a great idea to forbid the teacher from letting the parents know that this is going on.

Someone might be doing schtick here, but it sure isn't me.

I already said I'd support the teacher having the ability to use their own discretion. But now you're arguing against a broad policy decision with a personal anecdote. As a reminder, you said the following...

"But for argument's sake, sure let's say this is a result of there not being the best relationship in the home and that's why the student is using a different gender identify in school. How does it help matters by preventing the teacher and/or guidance counselor from discussing this with the parents?"

If you can't envision a scenario where disclosure of gender identify to a parent who has a poor relationship with their child could expose the child to verbal or emotional abuse or worse, then you're playing dumb yet again or haven't been around too many parents in certain parts of the country.

3 minutes ago, VanHammersly said:

In my son's fantasy football league, the loser has to wear a tail to school for a week. He had the #1 pick though so I think he's probably in the clear.

My neighbor’s son’s league has some funny punishments for last place. They did one where the loser had to sign up for an open mic comedy night and do standup reading jokes that the other owners wrote.

But then they also do ones that are just downright gross and terrible. Like the 2-4-6-8 challenge. You have 90 minutes to run 2 miles, eat 4 slices of pizza, drink 6 beers, and eat 8 donuts. I don’t think it’s even possible to do it I think the guy just ends up throwing up at some point.

1 minute ago, we_gotta_believe said:

I already said I'd support the teacher having the ability to use their own discretion.

So then what are you even arguing with me about? This is a real situation in which a teacher is forbidden from bringing up what’s going on to the parents. He wants to, but isn’t allowed to. And he’s not happy about the policy. He thinks he should be allowed to discuss it with the parents. I agree with his opinion. You agree with that opinion as well. So then what’s the argument about here?

"If you can't envision a scenario where disclosure of gender identify to a parent who has a poor relationship with their child could expose the child to verbal or emotional abuse or worse, then you're playing dumb yet again or haven't been around too many parents in certain parts of the country.”

And for the 2nd time, I’m not saying I’d be in favor of FORCING the teacher to disclose that information. I’m saying the teacher shouldn’t be PREVENTED from doing so if they think it would be in the best interest to do so.

30 minutes ago, Phillyterp85 said:

I think it's a pretty disingenuous statement to make to say that if a child is doing something in school that the parent is unaware of, then this means that there is a failure at home. Or that as long as you have a health relationship with your children, that means that you'll always be the first to know about something major before anyone else in their circle. And how does it help the situation if a teacher if forbidden from discussing the issue with the parents? If a student expressed to my friend that he was feeling down and/or depressed, he'd be allowed to talk to the parents about it. But that same child using a different gender identity in school, he'd be forbidden from bringing that up to the parents. Do you think that makes sense?

Your kids are going to do plenty of things at school that you are unaware of. Especially in secondary school, in middle school and above. You need to give them space to grow. Unless you want to be that helicopter parent that's in all their business all the time. Then don't send them to school.

Yes. If your child is having a major mental breakdown, then you as a parent should know. If this is happening in secret at school and the parents have no idea this is going on, then it is a failure at home. School can't fix it.

Maybe we need a larger discussion on the function of school. Teachers are not there to watch your kids and report back on everything they do. They are not babysitters.

Just now, Phillyterp85 said:

My neighbor’s son’s league has some funny punishments for last place. They did one where the loser had to sign up for an open mic comedy night and do standup reading jokes that the other owners wrote.

But then they also do ones that are just downright gross and terrible. Like the 2-4-6-8 challenge. You have 90 minutes to run 2 miles, eat 4 slices of pizza, drink 6 beers, and eat 8 donuts. I don’t think it’s even possible to do it I think the guy just ends up throwing up at some point.

My son's a couple years ago was drink a half gallon of milk (he's only 15 so thankfully they're not chugging bears) and run a mile and he got like 3rd to last place but for some weird reason he still had to do it. One of his friends moved to Israel and another one got sick or something, so he bit the bullet. He made it through it without puking but I suspect he didn't actually drink a whole lot of that milk.

2 minutes ago, toolg said:

Your kids are going to do plenty of things at school that you are unaware of. Especially in secondary school, in middle school and above. You need to give them space to grow. Unless you want to be that helicopter parent that's in all their business all the time. Then don't send them to school.

Yes. If your child is having a major mental breakdown, then you as a parent should know. If this is happening in secret at school and the parents have no idea this is going on, then it is a failure at home. School can't fix it.

Maybe we need a larger discussion on the function of school. Teachers are not there to watch your kids and report back on everything they do. They are not babysitters.

 Never said I want to be a helicopter parent.  Never said that it’s a good idea to be a helicopter parent.  Never said that it’s a teacher’s job to be a baby sitter and report every little thing that happens at school to parents.  What I did say is that if a child is secretly changing their gender identity at school, and the teacher wants to talk to the parents about it, then they should have that option.  

I doubt that the middle school my friend teaches at is the only school in the country with that policy.